Monday, February 4, 2013

Raw..

Don't know what happened.. but woo wee, this girl has gone into an intense bit of grieving.

Was fine until PMS week hit, and woosh..down down I went.

It's ok.

I mean.

I don't like hard feelings, but it definitely is a great time to embrace what is hard and just let it run eb and flow.

Thought it would go away after pms was over.. I always spring right back,  but noooot so much.

It's still here.

The grief. The loss. And the letting go.

I want to let go. I want to see brightly into the future, but am realizing first I have to visit with the grief of losing this beautiful state, and the dreams we have made here.
The dreams that we were stepping towards.

My chest is tight.
My tummy a mess.
I think I have been shocked and in "get my baby out of danger" mode.
But now, as everything is settling in, I find I am just sad.

It will be ok.
I will be ok.

Just breathing. and being. and crying.

love to you.

xo

Amy


4 comments:

  1. Aw I am so sorry. You are wise to feel it all. very normal...The grief over loss and opportunities and dreams is the toughest grief whether to do with places or people sometimes. You worked for this and you will work for your future more...but it will be tough...and sometimes it will be all worth it too...but for now- you do have some loss to grieve...and I admire you all the more for it...if you ever need to talk on the phone...I lost your number but you are welcome to email...I dont mind listening to crying either. I feel for you. May you find more peace within the inconsistent.
    P.S. Remember to breathe and take your supplements...:)

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  2. sometimes just breathing and being and crying is enough. broken dreams are rough :( but the glory that is life and living is everywhere..even going back to what you left, we don't know what beauty is around the next corner, what miracle, what magic. hold on sister, let yourself grieve and then that spark will come, that otherworldy breath and life will open to you in exactly the way you need it to. xoxo

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  3. P.S. To distract you - read the latest drama in my hubby's family. Spitting nails tonight friend and feeling alone. I would love your feedback!

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  4. feeling you
    seeing you
    holding you
    loving you

    you are beautiful and powerful Amy
    believe it♥

    love and light

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